A Proper Date
by SaxyGirl
Summary: A sort of Marriage Law/Re-population fic in which Sirius promises to take Hermione on a proper date before they're forced to enter the program. Definitely EWE.


_I don't typically dabble in much besides Skyrim, but I read a prompt/comment on Tumblr about Sirius and it led to… well this. On the plus side, it's kicked my muse back into gear. Sort of. She's a hot mess right now. Anyway, I own nothing HP related – JKR owns it all because that woman is a mad genius! P.S. I am most definitely NOT British. Please forgive any butchering of their English…_

 _llllll_

Harry folded the Daily Prophet with a snap, laying it down on the table next to the giant mop of brown curls that was Hermione Granger. "So that's it then. They're really doing this?" he murmured. There was a muffled response from the hair that he assumed was affirmative. He shared a concerned look with Ron. "You do at least get some choice in the matter though, right?" he offered, hand burrowing through her tresses to find and pat her back awkwardly. "You fill out the survey and that will keep you from ending up with anybody too awful, right?" There were more muffled noises and he was pretty sure he heard what sounded like a sob. The look on his face became horrified. He and Ron were pants at dealing with crying women.

"C'mon Mione," Ron hedged, his hand joining Harry's in the awkward patting. Something about it made her cry harder, her entire frame practically shaking with the weight of her sobs. "Merlin's beard, Hermione, calm down! It's not the end of the world," Ron added.

She moved, her face appearing from the mass of curls, tears running steadily down her face. "You have no idea what it is, Ronald Weasley," she hissed. "You're not the one who must marry somebody you might not even know, let alone have feelings for!" Ron glowered and muttered something that Harry barely caught the end of and his eyes widened considerably. The tears on Hermione's face dried as she went from distraught to enraged in mere moments. "What. Did. You. Say?" she bit out between clenched teeth.

Ron shifted and started sliding out of his chair, realizing he had made a very Serious Error. "I er… I said that… well…" She growled at him and his eyes narrowed. "I said it's your own bloody fault, Hermione! You were the one spouting off to anybody with ears about genetics and dee en whatever and how purebloods marrying purebloods was why there were so many squibs being born. What did you think the Ministry was going to do?"

Hermione sighed and she shrugged weakly. "Something reasonable. Blood tests before issuing marriage licenses maybe. Not… not this!" She slapped the paper and it caught fire at her touch.

Harry calmly put the fire out. "You really give the Ministry too much credit, Hermione," he commented. She released a long sigh and her head thumped against the table.

The door to the kitchen of Grimmauld Place squeaked open and the two men looked at the newcomer. Sirius Black, looking much more youthful than he had before he fell into the veil, stood in the entryway, one eyebrow arched in curiosity. "What's going on in here then?" he asked, sauntering towards the table. Harry tossed what was left of the paper to him and his eyes scanned over the story. "Morgana's tits," he said. "They've really gone off the deep end this time. I feel for the poor witches and wizards that will be sucked into that." He threw the paper on the table.

"Uh, Sirius…" Harry started, sharing another look with Ron. "You do realize that will apply to you as well?"

"Like hell," Sirius retorted. "I'm too old. The paper specifically says all unwed witches and wizards between the ages of twenty and forty."

"Oh no." Hermione's whispered exclamation drew their attention. Her eyes were wide, looking huge on her face as she stared at Sirius in horror. "Oh gods I'm sorry Sirius," she added.

"Whatever for, Dove?" he asked, settling into a chair and leaning back casually as he studied her.

"You're not… Sirius don't you remember? When I brought you back from the veil, I had to… Sirius you're technically thirty now," she blurted. "So not only do I have to deal with this, but you do too, and because of me." She let out an anguished sound and curled in on herself, her arms wrapping over her head. Harry and Ron looked at each other helplessly. Hermione had never made a sound like that before.

Sirius, thankfully, had some inkling of what to do and was around the table and on his knees next to her chair. "Hermione, Dove, I'd much rather be alive and saddled to some witch I barely know, than still stuck in limbo or wherever I was. You do not need to be upset on my account." He reached out and tucked her hair behind her ears, wiping her tears with his thumbs. "Come on now, I know it seems awful at the moment, but I also know that your big, beautiful brain is going to come up with some way to wiggle around their system. You always do." He chucked her under the chin and winked. "Why don't you go up and have a long bubble bath and relax, hm? Then when you're rested you can come up with a plan of attack."

"Okay," she whispered, rising from her chair. Her steps were slow and dragging as she headed towards the door.

"Use the bath in my room, Dove," Sirius called after her. "If you check the bottom drawer there are some scented oils in there that will help you relax." She gave a half-hearted nod and then disappeared.

"Scented oils?" Ron asked, nose wrinkled as he looked at Sirius.

Sirius frowned at him. "You really think that veil lead to a nice quiet limbo?" he retorted. "I need something to calm me down after a nightmare." Ron and Harry paled and Sirius sat in Hermione's chair. "Now, fill me in on this new law. Looks like Hermione managed to torch the details of how the couples are chosen."

Harry shrugged. "It's pretty simple. All the witches and wizards will receive a short survey in the mail and complete it and send it back in. They have some spell that will determine who should be paired up and the results will be mailed back out. The parties have er… thirty days I think to protest the match."

"Yeah, but Hermione said something about how in order to protest it you must have some pretty good evidence on why," Ron interjected and Harry nodded in agreement.

"Then the couple has a year to get pregnant-"

"And if they don't they have to provide medical evidence of why they're not pregnant," Ron interrupted. Harry shot him a look and the redhead quieted.

"Then once the child is born they are free to stay together or separate," he finished, turning the paper around with a small frown. "They keep calling it a marriage law, but technically nobody has to get married," he added. "That's actually not one of the requirements."

Sirius cradled his chin in one hand, eyes thoughtful as he stared at the door where Hermione had disappeared. "It's not a great solution, I'll admit, but it's not as bad as it could be. They could saddle the two of them together forever, or make them produce more than one child."

"What's your point?" Ron asked.

Sirius rolled his eyes as he pushed away from the table. "My point is that if it's not that bad, why is Hermione so upset?" he responded.

 _lllll_

Sirius found Hermione two hours later in the library. She was wrapped in his robe and curled up on the couch with a giant book in her lap. "H'lo Dove," he said, dropping onto the couch. "Trying to find a way out of your forced relationship?"

"Sort of," she replied. When she did not continue he nudged her with his toe. She blinked over at him and he arched his eyebrows expectantly. She sighed. "I'd rather not tell you."

"If you don't tell me, how am I supposed to exploit the same loophole?" he asked with a grin.

She rolled her eyes. "Actually, this loophole would be a lot easier for you to exploit than me," she responded. "But only if you want to castrate yourself."

Sirius nearly swallowed his tongue in surprise and he snatched the book from her lap before she could react. Sure enough, it was an ancient medical tome with spells about permanently removing the ability for one to produce children. "Hermione, what the fuck?" he exhaled, absolute shock rolling through his system. He knew she was upset, but to take away her ability to have children was beyond extreme. "What… why would you even… Hermione?" His voice squeaked with disbelief.

"I don't have to have children naturally," she retorted. "There are tons of orphans from the war and I'm certain this… this law will breed many more unwanted children! And I don't even need magical children. There are squibs who need a parent who can navigate both worlds, somebody who can help them acclimatize to the Muggle world. It's… it's noble!"

"Hermione." He dropped the tome to the floor with a thud, ignoring her wince at his mistreatment of the book. "Hermione, taking away your ability to have children is dangerous, even for a witch as capable as you. Which I'm sure you know, so why would you ever consider this?" He gripped her hands, rubbing his thumbs over the back. "Come on, Dove. You can tell me."

"You'll just laugh. It's so stupid," she whispered.

He squeezed her hands gently. "Anything that would make you consider harming yourself like that is not stupid Hermione. Tell me." He looked at her earnestly and she gnawed on her lip, indecision plain on her face. A thought struck him and he pulled out his wand, casually flicking it to close and lock the door and cast a silencing spell. "There. Now if they wander down here they won't hear you. And I won't tell them."

She sighed and looked down at where their hands were clasped in her lap. "Is it so wrong that I want to marry for love?" she asked softly. "I've never… I've never really been in love. I mean, I had a crush on Ron but it wasn't..." She sighed and seemed to shrink in on herself. "I've never even been on a real date," she murmured. Sirius blinked in surprise. "I know I went to the Yule Ball with Viktor, but that hardly counts because it was the ball and Ron ruined it for me. And, yes, he took me to Hogsmeade a couple of times, but… well I was so young. I wasn't ready for real dates and then by the time I was we were entrenched in the war and after that it was so natural for Ron and I to get together, but his idea of a date is going to the pub for dinner. Not… not a real date." She sniffled a little. "I know it's… unrealistic but is wanting some romance so wrong?"

"No," Sirius responded, his voice also pitched low. She started a little and he realized she had forgotten he was there during her mini tirade. "No, Dove. That's not wrong at all. Every woman deserves a man who will give her a little romance. But Hermione, even if you are paired with somebody who doesn't give you romance, you don't have to stay with them."

She raised watery eyes up to his face. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to be a single mother trying to date?" she asked.

He tilted his head, one brow raised. "No, but I'm pretty sure you don't either," he responded. "Unless there's something you need to tell us."

She rolled her eyes. "I've read about it," she replied. "Finding a trustworthy sitter, finding somebody who is willing to take on the responsibility of a child that isn't theirs, finding somebody who you can trust around your child." She shook her head. "I have no desire to bring a child into something like that."

"You make it sound like you're going to be all alone," Sirius commented. "Even if the child's father were to disappear completely, something he can't do according to the law, you still have Harry and Gin, Ron and Luna, and me."

"You'll have your own child to worry about, just like the rest of them," she pointed out.

"True," he admitted. "But do you really think I'm not going to need your help at some point?" She rolled her eyes again though before she could respond there was a tapping on the window. Sirius released Hermione's hands and opened it to let in the owl. He took the two letters and gave the owl a treat, closing the window behind it. He noted the seal of the Ministry and flipped them over to find his name scrawled neatly across one letter and Hermione's on the other. "Wow. They are not wasting any time, are they?" he murmured.

Hermione stared at the letters in horror as Sirius made his way back to the couch. He settled next to her and placed the letters on a small table where Hermione could not see them and then turned back to her. "I tell you what, Dove. We'll get our results sixty days from today, right?" he asked. She nodded slowly. "The night before, you and I will go on date. One last night of freedom before we find out what the Ministry has in store for us."

"Going to the pub and getting sloshed on whiskey will be fun, but is not a date," she muttered. Sirius frowned, more than a little insulted.

"I meant a proper date, Hermione. No pubs. I promise. What have you got to lose?" he asked. Her eyes wandered down to the tome. "I swear Hermione if you even think of doing that to yourself again I will tell Harry and Ron and you know what they'll do," he threatened. She frowned at him, aware that the two of them would make sure she was never alone to follow through with the spells in the tome. Sirius also silently vowed to hide all the medical or even remotely medical books until this whole fiasco was over. "C'mon Dove," he urged her.

She exhaled slowly. "Fine," she agreed. "But if it isn't a proper date, I'm going to hex you."

He chuckled. "Agreed."

 _lllll_

Hermione stood in front of the mirror in her room, fingers fussing with her hair before she gave up with an exasperated sigh. She looked away from the bushy mess and down to her outfit. She had chosen to wear a floor length sleeveless gown, the straps on her shoulders not quite an inch wide. It was a deep blue color, one that looked almost black until the light hit it just right. She slipped her shoes on and checked her make up one last time, not even sure why she was spending so much time getting ready. Sirius had been missing for the entire day and the only reason she thought he might show up was the cryptic message she had received in his scrawling handwriting instructing her to 'dress to impress'.

A knock at the door interrupted her thoughts and she glanced at it. "Hermione, are you sure you don't want to go to the pub and get sloshed?" Ron asked through the door.

"Quite sure," she snapped back at him before she exhaled softly and reminded herself that he was only trying to help. She opened the door and smiled at him. "I have other plans," she added. Ron's jaw dropped when he saw her and he stared long enough that she started to feel uncomfortable. "Ron?" she asked.

His mouth snapped shut and he shook his head. "It's… nothing Hermione just… wow." His eyes skated over her again. Luna came floating up to him and slipped her arm through his, resting her head on his shoulder. Her rounded stomach was finally noticeable under her robes and Hermione envied the small woman. She was adorable in her pregnancy.

"You look fantastic Hermione," Luna declared. "He won't know what hit him." Hermione's hand reached to her hair absently and Luna grinned. "Don't worry. He likes your hair like that." The brunette blinked at the other woman. Luna tugged on Ron's arm and dragged him down the hall and Hermione could hear him asking what was going on as they rounded the corner.

Downstairs there was a knock on the front door and Hermione's heart jolted into her throat and she felt anxiety dancing along her veins. Her feet carried her towards the top of the stairs and she listened as Harry answered the door. "Sirius?" he asked. "Why are you knocking? You live here…" She peeked around the corner but could only see Harry's back. "What are you wearing?" Harry's voice had risen half an octave in disbelief. "You look... are you going to a costume party or something?"

Hermione's stomach dropped towards her toes and she stepped back, tears prickling along her eyelids as she realized this was all just some elaborate prank. "Shut up Harry," Ginny's scolding caught Hermione's attention and she eased towards the top of the stairs again. "I think he looks dashing. I'll go fetch her, but you remember, you be on your best behavior or there's a Bat Bogey Hex with your name on it."

Hermione stepped into view as Ginny reached the bottom of the stairs. The redhead flashed her a wide grin. "Your date's here, Hermione," she called.

"Date?" Harry's comment drifted into nothing as he treated her with the same open-mouthed stare Ron had given her.

"Merlin Harry, close your mouth or you'll catch flies," Ginny scolded. His jaw slowly closed but that did not stop his stunned look. Hermione moved down the stairs and towards the door, slightly embarrassed to realize her heart was thumping wildly in her chest. Ginny eased the door open farther and Hermione nearly stumbled in surprise.

Sirius stood outside, looking much different than she was used to. He was clean-shaven except for a rather attractive goatee. His shoulder length hair was pulled back into a neat tail, but the best part was the tuxedo he wore, complete with cape, cane, and top hat. Her steps slowed as she neared him, realizing belatedly that while he had managed to keep his mouth shut, he was staring at her much as the other two had.

She reached the door and paused, uncertain. Sirius blinked and seemed to find himself and he swept his hat off his head and into a deep bow, his other hand producing a small sunflower on a short stem. "Good evening," he greeted her and a shiver quaked down her spine at his soft voice.

She took the flower after Ginny nudged her in the back. "Good evening," she repeated. He straightened and graced her with a smile she could only call dashing as he placed the hat back on his head and eased the flower from her numb fingers. He tucked it behind her ear and a small wand movement had it held in place.

"You look beautiful, Hermione," he murmured. His eyes met hers and she could read the sincerity in them. Something welled within her chest and she blinked. The back of his fingers slid from her hair along her cheek and she swayed into his touch.

"What is going on here?" Harry demanded, breaking whatever was building between Sirius and herself. Hermione gasped, feeling as if cold water had been dumped on her head. Sirius glared at Harry.

"I made Hermione a promise that I would take her on a proper date before we were both forced into relationships we don't want. I'm following through on that promise. Now, if you don't mind." He tucked Hermione's arm through his and led her down to the sidewalk. Hermione could hear Ginny scolding Harry as the door closed and she forced her mind back to the present.

"You really do look lovely tonight, Dove," Sirius repeated, grinning down at her. There was enough of his usual self in the smirk that Hermione felt more at ease than she had since she started getting ready earlier that day.

"You look rather dashing yourself," she responded. "I didn't know you owned a tuxedo, with cape and top hat as well." She paused and her lips curled into a wicked smirk. "And a cane. How very… Malfoy of you."

He scoffed lightly. "We Blacks were carrying stately canes long before the Malfoys were. I seem to recall Lucius picking up the habit as a way to impress Narcissa's father," he declared.

Hermione giggled. "Well, it certainly suits you better than it ever did him. He had this way of… stroking it that was just obscene."

Sirius's nose wrinkled. "That's a horrible image," he muttered and then bumped her lightly with his hip. "No more talk of the Malfoys or any of the rest of them. It's rude to talk of other men when you're on a date."

"I see," she returned. "And just where are you taking me on this date?"

He grinned. "Just wait and see."

 _lllll_

The crowd moved leisurely towards the exit of the theatre, nobody in much of a rush to break the spell of the show. Hermione understood their desire, the joy of the piece still rushing through her. She squeezed Sirius's arm slightly. "That was amazing," she said. "I haven't been to a play in ages." She studied him from the corner of her eyes. "I'm impressed you're so well versed in forms of Muggle entertainment," she commented. To her amusement she spotted a slight blush high on Sirius's cheekbones.

He cleared his throat as he guided her towards the doors. "James made it his mission to learn all he could about Muggle entertainment so that he could properly woo Lily. He would often drag me along so he didn't have to go by himself to scout these places." His eyes lit up with memories as he glanced around. "I will admit, I stole this idea from James. This was where he brought Lily for their first proper date."

"It was a brilliant idea, definitely one worth stealing," she responded. "What's next?"

He chuckled. "Impatient are we?" he teased her. "Next is an idea I stole from Remus. Well, partially. I don't think he had the original idea to take a date to dinner, but it is a restaurant that he found and it's fantastic." His excitement was infectious and Hermione found herself clutching his arm a little harder as they made their way through the city.

 _lllll_

Once their orders had been taken and wine had been poured Hermione felt anxiety beginning to creep back into her stomach. She had never been good at making conversation and Sirius was somebody who already knew so much about her. She fidgeted with the napkin in her lap as the silence stretched between them.

"Tell me, Dove," Sirius began, drawing Hermione's eyes up to him. "What do you want to be when you grow up?" He grinned at her and she could not help but smile back as she rolled her eyes.

"I already work for the rights of non-humans, Sirius," she replied, taking a sip of wine to steady her nerves.

Sirius shrugged. "Sure, and that's fine for now, but you can't tell me you intend to stop there, do you?" She paused, glass of wine part way to her lips, and blinked at him. He smirked. "I always had you pegged as more ambitious than that is all."

Her lips pursed and she drank some more of the wine. "Well, perhaps I'll be Minister of Magic when I grow up then," she teased.

"You'd certainly be a much more attractive one than Kingsley," Sirius returned and she chuckled.

"What about you?" she asked. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Sirius waggled his eyebrows. "I'm never growing up, Dove."

She rolled her eyes. "You can't just sit around doing nothing but living off your inheritance," she declared.

"Like hell I can't," Sirius replied. "I can and will." She frowned at him, unhappy with his choice to contribute nothing to society. He fiddled with his fork for a few moments before continuing. "I think I'd like to teach maybe," he said quietly. "I've fought in two wars, seen a lot of good and bad things. I could use that experience to help kids learn why… why things need to be different now than they were." He looked up at her through his eyelashes. "Couldn't be worse than Binns was at any rate."

She giggled at his comment, struck through to the core with how sincere he was being. She reached out and cupped her hand over his. "I think you would make a fantastic teacher, Sirius," she said honestly. His time in the Veil had tempered him, reigning in the anger he had held so close when he first escaped Azkaban. Or perhaps it was the fact that he had gotten another chance at life.

"Do you really?" An eyebrow arched incredulously.

"Certainly," she said. "You do have a lot of experience you can draw from to help educate students. Not to mention you know every hidden tunnel in that castle. Think about it, hiding just inside the door to catch students trying to sneak out. Assigning them… creative detentions."

He tapped his chin in thought. "You mean, something better than scrubbing cauldrons or polishing awards?" he mused. She nodded and he hummed. "True. I could make them compose poetry in Minerva's honor, or sing lullabies to Poppy." His eyes lit up in amusement. "You might be onto something there, Dove. I'll have to ask Minerva about it." Their food was brought soon after and their conversation dwindled as they both relished the delicious meals and Hermione found herself enjoying not only the food but also the company.

 _lllll_

"Sirius," Hermione whined. "Can I open my eyes yet?" He had his top hat balanced on her head, pushed down to keep her from seeing anything but her own feet as he led her along the sidewalk. She had lost her sense of direction ages ago and only hoped he was not about to walk her straight into the Thames.

"Just a moment, Dove," he responded and she could hear the grin in his voice. He stopped her walking and his hand rested lightly against her lower back. "Go ahead now," he encouraged her. She tugged the hat away and gasped.

"Dancing?" she exclaimed, spinning to face him, excitement bubbling out of every fiber of her being. "We're going dancing?" He nodded, a wide smile on his face at her joy. "I haven't been dancing in ages, not since the Yule ball. Oh I love dancing." She grabbed his hand and tugged insistently, all but dragging him through the door and into the ballroom. A band was gathering on stage, tuning their instruments and warming up as couples milled around the dance floor, waiting for the music to start. "What kind of dancing is it?" she asked.

"That's the lovely part," Sirius replied. "They do music from several different genres and timeframes. There will be waltzes to swing dancing to pop music."

The musicians settled into their seats and started up an easy waltz. Hermione allowed herself to be led to the dance floor, eyes taking in everything. "Whose idea was this?" she asked with a small grin as Sirius took her hand in his and placed the other at the small of her back. He arched a brow in question and she shrugged. "The play was James, the restaurant Remus, I was wondering if you stole this idea from somewhere."

Sirius chuckled softly and shifted her slightly closer. "From here on out, Dove, everything we do is my idea," he murmured into her hair. She grinned, even though he could not see her face, and moved even closer to him as he led her around the dance floor.

 _llll_

It was well after midnight when Hermione and Sirius danced their way out of the ballroom and into the street, sharing goodbyes with the few other couples who were still there. He spun her along the empty sidewalk, their laughter ringing through the streets and alleys. "I haven't had that much fun in ages," Hermione giggled, threading her arm through his as they stopped their dancing and began meandering along the sidewalk. "When you asked the maestro if he had sheet music for The Chicken Dance…" she trailed off as they both laughed again. "I thought he was going to jump from the stage and throttle you."

"Even better was the fact that they musicians actually knew the songand they decided to play it without his permission," Sirius added. "I've never seen so many well-dressed people flapping their arms like birds!"

"Could you imagine if they played that at a Ministry function?" Hermione asked and they both dissolved into giggles again. As their laughter died down Hermione shivered and rubbed her hands over her arms. It was nice out, but the breeze was enough to make her wish she had some kind of jacket. She blinked as Sirius settled his cape around her shoulders, securing it beneath her chin. "So what's next?" she questioned.

"I'm afraid that's it, besides a leisurely stroll back home," he responded. She hummed in response, the silence settling over them like a blanket. As they neared Grimmauld, Hermione realized she did not want the date to end, and not just because the date ending meant she would have to face the reality of a new relationship with a potential stranger.

Sirius seemed to share her feelings because his steps slowed until they were barely moving. Inevitably they reached the house and paused before the door, turning to face each other. "I had an amazing time tonight, Sirius," she murmured, unable to raise her eyes above his chest.

"I did also, Dove," he responded, just as softly. "It was up to your standards? I don't need to fear a hexing in the future?" he teased lightly and she let out a surprised laugh, looking up at him.

"No. No hexings. At least not for this," she replied. They stood there for a few more moments and then he drew her into a hug.

"Good night Hermione," he said as he released her. Her hand darted out and gripped his jacket sleeve, stopping him. He arched a brow at her and she licked her lips.

"Don't…" She faltered and then gathered her courage and faced him fully. "Don't real dates end with a good night kiss? Not a hug?" she challenged him.

A look shifted over his face and was gone before she could identify it. He took hesitant steps back over to her. "Usually," he admitted. She found herself backing away from him until she was up against the door and he was a breath away. "But our circumstances are… not normal," he continued, gazing down at her.

"So?" She was surprised to find herself a little breathless at his proximity.

His eyes closed and he leaned his forehead against hers. "Hermione," he exhaled. "I want nothing more than to hold you and kiss you but tomorrow we both start a new relationship with other people. It's going to be hard enough without knowing exactly what I'm losing." Hermione gasped as his words sank in and her hands curled around the lapels of his jacket.

"I don't care," she hissed out. "You promised me a real date, and real dates end with a proper kiss. You kiss me right now Sirius Black, or I promise you there will be a hexing!"

He blinked at her in surprise and then a small grin curled the corner of his lips. "As you demand, Dove," he murmured. His hands slid along her hips and around her back beneath the cape she still wore and he drew her against him. His lips feathered along her brow and down her nose before he pressed them to hers. Her breath caught and she arched up against him as their mouths melded. It was a relatively chaste kiss, only lips on lips with no tongue involved, but it still set her body aflame.

He pulled away slowly and she could see the want in his eyes, feel it pressed, hot and heavy, against her torso. "Gods I wish we'd done this sooner," she murmured.

Sirius let out a strangled laugh. "Why, so we can have more time to enjoy what we can't have?" he pressed kisses along her hairline and she slipped one hand under his jacket to stroke along his chest.

"No," she sighed, tilting her head to accept more of his attention. "There's another loophole, but I never imagined… I never thought it would be attainable."

His mouth paused and he leaned back slightly. "What loophole?" he asked slowly.

"If the witch in question is pregnant, she is automatically removed from the pool, as is the wizard who fathered her child," Hermione explained, not seeing the exasperated look he was giving her, much too focused on petting the muscles of his chest and abdomen through his shirt.

Sirius growled and pushed her hard against the door and she blinked up at him. "You mean to tell me," he rumbled, "That all I needed to do was get you pregnant and this entire thing could have been avoided?"

Her eyes narrowed. "Technically yes," she responded. "And before you get more upset, that loophole doesn't change a thing. I still want romance, I still want real dates."

He let out a noise that sounded like a whine and snarl mixed. "I understand that, Dove, but I could've taken you on our first date two damned months ago and who knows how many more since? Plus, I could've gotten you pregnant!"

"We still have time Sirius," she reminded him. "The owls don't come out until this afternoon." A look of determination crossed his face and the next thing she knew they were in her bedroom, his fingers deftly removing her dress.

"I hope you have a fertility potion handy, or a spell memorized, we've only got enough time to give this two, maybe three attempts," he told her as her clothing hit the floor, followed very closely by his.

Hermione chuckled and plucked up her wand, pointing it at her abdomen and casting the only fertility spell in existence, the one she knew from reading that tome he had stolen from her those months ago. "Guaranteed pregnancy," she assured him. He grinned and then pounced, tackling her back onto the bed.

 _lllll_

"Has anybody seen Hermione or Sirius since last night?" Harry asked, pushing his eggs around on his plate with his toast.

"No," Ginny responded, sharing an amused look with Luna. "But we heard them come in. They're fine."

"Maybe I should go see if they want breakfast." He started to rise from the table.

"No!" Luna and Ginny yelled and Harry froze, eyeing them suspiciously. Ginny cleared her throat. "I mean, they came in late. I'm sure they want to sleep."

Harry sank into his chair, plucking his toast back up. Ron stumbled in a few moments later, a couple of cards in his hands. "What's that?" Harry asked.

"Notes for Sirius and Hermione. The bloody owl kept slamming into Sirius' window but he wouldn't answer it, so I opened mine and beckoned the thing over. Damn thing nipped me for all the trouble I saved it," Ron grumped.

Harry plucked up one of the cards, noting the ministry symbol on the front with the word "Congratulations" scrawled underneath it. He flipped it over and his toast fell from numb fingers as he read it.

"What is it Harry?" Ginny asked.

"It says, 'We are pleased to offer "Congratulations" to Sirius Black and Hermione Granger on the upcoming birth of their child and to notify them their names have been removed from the repopulation list.'" He blinked and read the card again. "I don't…"His voice trailed off and he watched Ginny hand Luna a stack of galleons.

"I thought for sure it would take more than one date for him to pull that off," Ginny muttered.

Luna shook her head, a wide grin on her face. "Sirius Black was raised during his formative years by one of the oldest and most formal pureblood families around. Of course he would know how to properly woo the woman he loves."

"Woman he loves?" Ron squeaked. "Harry, what are they talking about? What are you talking about?"

The door to the kitchen opened and Sirius came sashaying in. He collected two plates and loaded them up with food before he noticed the cards and picked them up. He glanced over them and grinned. "Oh good. I'll have to tell Hermione the spell worked." He paused and winked at Ginny and Luna. "After a couple more rounds of course," he added. Harry let out a strangled noise and Ron looked like he was going to pass out. "We may be down for dinner, haven't decided yet," Sirius added as he disappeared out the door.

"I think now would be a good time to tell them," Luna said. "They're already stunned and you and I can be well on our way before it sinks in completely." Ginny nodded in agreement.

"Tell us what?" Harry asked warily.

"Oh," Ginny smiled brightly. "I'm pregnant too, about two months along. And I'm fairly certain it's twins, but I'll let you know for sure after I've seen the healer this morning. Ta!" She and Luna scurried away and Harry stared dumbly after them, ignoring the thump of Ron hitting the floor.


End file.
